Because I care (Morgan, invited only)

Morana was sitting in the woods nearby the Godric's Hollow. She was in UK to visit Barty and Lestranges so she figured she could also talk to Morgan. She sent her an owl telling her where she will be waiting and wait was all she had to do now.

Morgan slipped out of her house and headed to the location Morana's owl had asked her to meet at. She was happy to see Morana. Since she had gotten engaged, Morgan really hadn't had a lot of time to chat with her, or really see her for that matter. Morgan missed her, and was looking forward to a friendly meeting.

As she rounded the corner leading to where Morana said she would be, Morgan spotted her. She gave a wave and a soft smile. Morgan took a seat next to Morana and said, "It's been ages! I've missed our chats.... How have you been?"

Morana smiled as she saw her friend and hugged her tight as Morgan sat next to her. "Fine, I guess. You know, wedding is closer and closer, it keeps me busy," she answered, remembering that until the day she will become mrs. Crouch was less than four months. "And how are you?" She asked her back.

"That's so exciting, Morana. I'm so happy for the two of you," she said returning the hug. "You know, nothing special. Summer holiday tends to mean home with the crazy family, which means I'm not there if I can manage it. But, things have been oddly peaceful this summer so far," she answered. Morgan didn't know why things were different this summer, but they were, and, for now, that was alright by her. "How is Barty? Getting nervous?" she aske with a smile.

"More like jealous," sighed Morana. "Well, not that he wasn't jealous before, I think he is the most possessive man in this World, but it's getting worse. And I like it, which makes even more worse," she added. "Remus paid me a visit you know, after the Sirius jack-ass Black situation," she also added the reason why Barty got jealous without even having a reason. On the other hand, the situation as it was in the moment her fiance arrived was very unfortunate. Or how to say that.

Morgan laughed at hearing about Barty and his possesiveness over Morana, and even more when she heard that Morana liked it. "Then you two are truly made for each other," she teased. At hearing that Remus had gone to her after the night in the forest, Morgan pulled her knees up to her chest. "He did? What did he say?" she asked, timidly.

"I wouldn't call it a speech honestly. He wanted to kill Sirius, he was paranoid Black is going to take you away from him and than I gave him my bottle of whiskey, which he stole and drank to the bottom," Morana answered honestly. "He really loves you, Morgs. He is terrified of losing you. So much that he even..." Morana stopped, what could she say? That he even doesn't want to tell you how he feels towards death eaters? Was she stupid? "... never mind. You got my point anyway, right?" she smiled at her friend.

Morgan sighed as Morana told her about Remus' state when he went to see her. "I know he his. I tried to tell him it was nothing. That Sirius isn't trying to take me away. That were are just good friends. But, he didn't hear me...." she said remembering clearly that night. "I told him that I loved him and that I was his, but it's like he's sure that I'm going to leave, going to go back to Sirius. I can't. Sirius and I aren't meant for each other.... Remus and I...." Morgan stopped. She didn't know what to say. It was just repeating over and over the same thing.... Morgan buried her face against her knees, "I'm sorry, Morana."

"Don't be sorry, I am sure it wasn't your fault. And I am sure you wouldn't leave Remus. Specialy not for Sirius," Morana smiled. "But truth is Remus is unsure and I won't lie to you in this. He is kind of afraid that the same thing that happened to you and Rabs will happen," she said with sigh. She had to tell Morgan. Even if Remus would be mad at her and never talk to her again. Morgan needed to know.

Morgan looked up at Morana, confusion painted all over her face. "Why would he be worried about something like that? Remus isn't like Rabastan...." she said.

"I told him that," Morana said as she looked up to the sky and than sighed. "But truth is, that he may not be exactly like Rabs, but there is a thing they have in common," she added.

"And what is that?" Morgan asked timidly. Truthfully, she was a little worried about what that something might be. She thought over all the things she knew about the two of them to see if she could find it.... They both loved her, both were older, both were possessive to a degree, both cared deeply for their friends, both didn't want to hurt her.... None of those things would give her a reason to leave him, so what was it?

Morana wasn't sure how to explain darkness in heart of her best friend. She felt like words weren't good way to describe it. Remus desired darkness, but he wasn't a monster like Rabs, Barty or Morana herself. With him, it was more about chosing sides. And of course, temptation of dark arts. All she did was, that she turned her piercing eyes from the sky and looked into Morgan's with strange sadness. Because she wasn't really sad about Remus being who he was, she was just sorry for Morgan, because especially now, she felt like the darkness she brought over her, will take her no matter how much she would try to escape.

Morgan waited for Morana to explain, but she didn't. Instead, Morgan saw the sadness in her dark eyes as she looked at her. Her heart began to sink. Whatever it was couldn't be good if it cause Morana to look that way, for such sadness to fill her eyes. Morgan put a hand on her hand and asked, "What is it?" Morgan's own bright eyes pleading for an answer.

"He is... he is not going to hero of the light side, Morgs," was probably the best way how to explain it. "He is not one of us, but he is very tempted to be. He is not like Rabs, but that doesn't automaticaly make him a good one," she added. Whole situation with Sirius probably didn't help it at all, but that wasn't thing Morana needed to say. "And he is afraid to tell you, because you are love of his life," she added.

Morgan's jaw went slack at hearing that Remus was tempted to join Morana and Rabastan in the dark. She looked away as she thought about what Morana said. "Why couldn't he tell me?" she said quietly, more to herself than anyone. He should be able to talk to her about anything..... "I love him so much. Why couldn't he talk to me about this?" she asked, a small quiver in her voice as she looked back at Morana realizing that what Sirius had mentioned was more true than she wanted to believe.

"He would talk to you about this eventually. He would have to. As I said, he loves you and as much as he is terrified you will eave him for the part of him he still carries hidden inside, he would never hid this away from you forever," Morana said. "Morgan, it's hard to put those things in words for me. How do you think he feels? He doesn't want to lose you," she said seriously as she looked at her. "And I know you are not fan of this and I am sorry, because it was me who got you into darkness, but I beg you to look at it objectively now, please," Morana continued. She wished for Morgan to see the fact that no matter how bad or evil they were, Morana, Marvolo or Rabs were always there. Even when others left. For Morgan and for Remus as well.

"I can only imagine...." Morgan said looking away. She didn't know what to do. Sirius told her that she could get Remus back to the light, that she was strong enough. But.....now, hearing all this.....she didn't know. Morgan literally felt like she was walking a line between the two worlds that were coming to a head around her. A line between two worlds where she finally picked which side she belonged on. "How can we all be there for each other when this coming storm hits, Morana?" she asked, looking at the ground.

Morana sighed and looked to the ground. "I hate to say it this way. Or any other way for that matter. But maybe you should really consider who was and still is here for you no matter what happened and who turned their back on you when you didn't follow what they liked," said Morana honestly. "That's what Remus does. After all, why from all the people in this world it was me he came to. And why it was his so called best friend, the reason he came to me in the first place?" For once in her life, Morana didn't turn reality into her own words. For once in her life, this wasn't meant to be a manipulation, but friendly advice. "It's not all about becoming a killer, you know? That's not what Remus wants. It's about chosing where do you feel the best," she added.

Morgan stood as she listened to Morana's words and began to pace. Morana said that a single choice didn't have to be made. Sirius said that a side had to be chosen. Morgan picked to stand with Sirius and James and the others, but she didn't want to simply abandon the others that she cared about. She felt like she was going mad with the entire situation. "All those who have been with me all along are spread between the light and the dark, Morana. And each side is telling me a different solution, a different way things have to be. I just feel like no matter what I do, nothing is right...." she said wrapping her arms around herself. Morgan had come to terms with what had happened to her when she was lost. She was the one, who had turned her back on her friends....

"Nobody is telling you what to do. At least nobody can. You know that I would never force you to choose. Neither would Marvolo or Rabs. And Remus? He would never do such a thing as well. Just because he is tempted, doesn't mean you have to become a death eater, you know?" Morana told her, she wished Morgan could understand that. "He doesn't expect you to follow him, to become like him, like us. He is just afraid you won't be able to accept that and that's a huge difference," she said in order to explain mainly Remus' situation. "I know you would love to go back to the light and be there, with him. But let's face it. You will never be good enough in their eyes anymore and you know it. And do you really want Remus to stand on the opposite side of the baricade than he would wish for?" she asked her.

Frustrated tears filled Morgan's eyes. She didn't know what to do. She understood that Remus picking the darkness over the light didn't mean that she was expected to be a Death Eater, she knew that. Morana was right that it seemed the only ones making her pick a side were those on the light side, but that was where she felt she belonged, where she wanted to be. Her tears spilled over and she wiped them away angrily at the words that Morgan would never be good enough to be back in the light. It couldn't be true.....

"I want to stand on the light side, Morana. It's where I belong. And whether they think I'm good enough or not, it's where I belong. I want Remus to stand where he feels he belongs. I want it to be with me, but I don't know where his choice will be. I can't lose him....." she said as a sob broke through her strong front. She was afraid of losing him, too.....

Morana hugged her tight. "I am really sorry for all of this. I never wanted you to suffer this way. And I know it was be who surrounded you by darkness," she whispered and wished she could make it go away. "But we are not that bad, you know? Stay with Remus, Morgan. That's the only advise I can give to you. It doesn't matter if he decided to carry dark mark one day or not, he will always love you, cherish you and bring you heaven. Isn't that the most important thing?" Morana wiped Morgan's tears away and smiled at her weakly.

"Look at me, being all bad death eater and when I lost my patronus I thought my World went down," she smirked bitterly. Only Remus, Barty and her sister knew about her not being able to cast patronus anymore. And about the pain she felt over it. "Truth is, it is Barty who brings the worst of me on surface. That's why I didn't want to let him closer than being friends for so long. I was scared of the darkness. Me! But in the end, I decided to believe in him and his choices, just like he always believed in mine. And I don't regret it. You and Remus are the same in brighter version," she said.

Morgan hugged Morana tightly. "It wasn't just you, Morana. You helped me to see things in a new way, and, I think, it was for the better..." Morgan said with broken breaths. She nodded at Morana's advice, "That is what I want more than anything, Morana."

Morgan looked at Morana as she told about her lost patronus. "You lost your patronus?" Morgan said in disbelief. Hearing her compare Barty and her relationship with what she and Remus had made her smile softly. "We need each other, I think," she said softly.

"After sister died. She came back, but my patronus didn't. I tried everything I could, but I guess it's just meant to be. People like me don't deserve to have one anyway," she smiled, so Morgan couldn't see how much this thing still hurt her. "And yes, you two are made for each other. And I know it's hard, but sometimes is better to let things go, so you can see the new, better ones," Morana said and looked up to a sky again.