I'm Titanium (Bill)

"Well, that's good to know," he said, a dry smile rested upon his face. He had already known that she hadn't hurt the people that he cared about the most, as it would have been hard for him not to have known if she had. Bill frowned at her response. Did she actually mean that? He kind of hoped that she was joking, although it was a pretty sick joke if she was. "Why do you want to die?" He asked plainly, sure that he probably wouldn't be getting much information out of her. That didn't mean that he wouldn't try, though. He wondered if she really was that unhappy.

"Because I am a mistake, Bill. I am a prove of something terrible," she said simply. She couldn't tell him her family secrets. She couldn't tell him anything. And yet, in that moment she really wanted to. "I am not playing mystery because it's fun. I am doing it, because it's the only way, just... trust me on this okay?" she gave him a weak smile before she pulled out another cigarette and lit it again. Still looking at him, she could see the beauty in him. He was handsome boy, growing into even more handsome man. He was clever for sure. And Misha could bet they shared their interrest for books. She could imagine his hands holding her. His lips on hers once again. With that thought, she closed her eyes again and shaked her head. Thank Rowena he cannot read thoughts.

Bill flinched at her words, although they shouldn't have hurt him. But the fact that she thought that she was a mistake broke his heart. Stop being so fucking soft, William! "You're not horrible, you know. You're a bit annoying, but I know that everyone other than me loves you," he hoped that his words sounded neutral enough. He didn't want to show her that he really cared, because he didn't want it thrown back in his face later. Although he wanted to tell her that he didn't like the idea of trusting her, he simply nodded, "Okay.." Before he could stop himself, his hand reached out to brush a piece of hair from her temple. After doing so, he quickly pulled his hand away and hoped that he just thought it was a breeze, since her eyes were closed and she couldn't see him.

"I wish you saw it that way even knowing all about me," she whispered, more to herself. When he touched her, it was so light and gently one could think it was just a breeze, but she knew it wasn't. She would recognize his touch even if she didn't have her eyes at all. It didn't matter she couldn't see him and that fact was driving her crazy. "Don't do this, please," she whispered again, this time towards him. Why did everything have to be so hard? How could she love Dec and yet feel so much for Bill as well?

"It's not like you'd give me a chance to.." he said. Where was this conversation even coming from? They had hated each other from the minute that they had met, and despite the fact that they'd admitted their reasons for that, he still thought it was strange. He wished that things were more simple, like they should be in school. Instead, here he was talking to someone that he was supposed to hate, and he couldn't bring himself to see her like that now. Bill bit his lip and sighed, "Don't do what, Misha?"

"I am not giving you that chance because I care too much for you, for my family, for my friends, for Dec. There is a skeleton in my closet. Many of them actually. I locked them there and I am not going to take them out. Because I simply can't. Even if I wanted to, even if I knew you would accept it, which you wouldn't, even that it's not my desicion to make," she told him and sighed. "You know too well what I meant, Bill. Just, don't go there okay?" she asked him to. He maybe didn't feel a thing for her, but she was in bigger mess with every his touch.

"Maybe some time you'll share," he said, but he knew that it wouldn't happen. "I don't really understand, but I'm not going to keep pushing you.." She'd never tell him, because he was the frustrating Gryffindor who she probably thought would throw it in her face during a fight or something. He wouldn't though, if it was something as serious as she was making it out to be. Then, maybe it was a good thing that she refused to tell him. Maybe it was so bad that he would truly hate her. He figured that he had been right about what she was referring to. He wasn't planning on making that mistake again, he was sure. "I won't, don't worry," he waned to be there for her, but he knew that he couldn't be. Besides, she had plenty of people to take care of her.

"Thank you," she whispered as answer to everything. With that, she lit another cigarette, enjoying the smoke. Looking at the Bill once again. In that moment, just for a second, she could imagine how amazing would it be if she was a normal girl, if she could be with him. A second that to her seemed like a lifetime. But being close to her, it meant only bad things. And she didn't want that for Bill.

"You're welcome, I guess," he said quietly. He laid back into the dirt, his hands clasped together over his stomach. Bill didn't even know what was going on, since just a few days before he and Misha had been fighting. It had been a pretty serious fight, in fact, and now they were talking like civilised friends. The worst part was, he didn't know how he was supposed to hate her after getting a brief glimpse into her personality. He wished that he hadn't stopped, so he could continue being completely oblivious to her pain, but now it was staring him straight in the face.